Dead Tired

I feel dead
Before I know that I am
Two halves of a worm
Make love in my hand

I feel nauseous
While I’m watching them fight
Like the headaches I get
From your SUV brights

I feel warmer
In front of their glow
In this way I am lighter
So much like a ghost

I feel nervous
When you’re coming to bed
Your practiced little hands
Your confident breasts

I feel quiet
As I’m getting to sleep
With an electrical hum
Suffocating me

I feel clumsy
Stuck in the cloth
I make awkward movements
To shut the alarm off

I feel stupid
I want to be touched
Your mom’s too-black coffee
Is waking me up

I feel better
When I stay in my brain
I used to like outside
But it’s just not the same

I feel older
When I’m thinking this way
It’s useless nostalgia
For a misremembered day

I feel handsome
When you tell me I am
Trace the lines with my finger
Of your different tans

I feel tired